Thursday, May 16, 2013

My Lot in Life

Day 16, Something difficult about your “lot in life” and how you’re working to overcome it.

The Definition of “lot in life”…

-It's a Biblical reference. Not to push religious belief, but the saying comes from the story in Genesis where Abraham and Lot part ways and Lot, not believing in Abraham's knowledge of God, seeks his own future. Lot parts ways with what God has commanded multiple times and throughout his life seeks the wrong path. Therefore, in his life he finds trouble throughout. People today, who find trouble in life, claim it is their "Lot" in life that they must endure.

I find it interesting that I had to search this definition to really understand what my lot in life was. Fun fact that “Lot” is a person’s name; I never knew that. The part of this definition that really jumps out at me though is that Lot was seeking his own future and not that of Gods. This is so relevant to where I am right now- seeking a future that I want and maybe not really understanding what God wants for my future.

This week I have run myself to the point of exhaustion- emotionally, physically, spiritually; I’m wiped out. I have nothing else to give, my tank is on empty. I have hit the gym hard, worked overtime hours, baby sat Halle, attended small group, played in 2 volleyball games, ate lunch and drank coffee with friends. It feels right in the moment to be the always yes girl; the “I can do more” “I can do better” “I can work out harder” girl but at the end of the week I find myself stressed, a little irritable and running on empty.

My Lot in life right now is finding balance. I want to be the best version of myself and this requires many of the things I love doing but it requires them in balance with the rest of my life. I need more of Jesus, time for myself and freedom from the daily grind I have come accustomed to. I understand that I cannot do it all, but I want to- so I try to do it all. I guess I have a slow learning curve because every time over-commit the end result is the same- exhaustion, in every way shape and form.

I am overcoming this by cutting out the unnecessary obligations, spending time with my main man upstairs and remembering that I do not have to be (nor can I be) all things to all people- all the time. I’m going to take this weekend for myself. Lord knows I need it.
On a lighter, more fun  note, I splurged on new running shoes this week! Cannot wait to run many miles in these kicks.

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